For many, dating today feels more challenging than ever. The competition is fierce, with many having to fake it to match the expectations and preferences of a limited pool of potential partners. The question that you need answered today is whether your cannabis use might be sabotaging your chances at romance. Sadly, it just might.
Why Might Cannabis Be A Dating Red Flag?
While cannabis is now legal in many states and awareness of its medical and therapeutic benefits is growing, strong stigma still surrounds it. Most of that stigma is due to how aggressively cannabis has been demonized by the powers that be earlier years.
There’s also the longstanding stereotype of cannabis users being unmotivated, unambitious, unwashed couch potatoes. People with this perception of cannabis tend to consider its use a red flag in dates, after all, who wants to date a loser? It’s probably why 60% of Americans say they would be upset if their date showed up high.
Then there’s the religious angle. If your date’s religion frowns upon cannabis, they likely won’t be open to dating you, regardless of whether you use it recreationally or medically. For more context, here are some anecdotes from Redditors concerning cannabis and dating:
- Cerenia: “It’s a dealbreaker for me. I hate the way it smells and just in general I don’t like if someone has to smoke to feel good. Life is already good as is and I prefer someone who feels the same. It’s just too much thinking for me. How is he with money, job, responsibilities, is he running from trauma etc. But if someone smokes once or twice a year, all right that’s cool for me. But anything else and we have different values regarding health and lifestyle. I like someone to be in their full senses all the time.”
- Auroraborelle: “I left swipe on 420 friendly, not because weed is an immediate dealbreaker, but because I’m 420 skeptical, not “friendly,” and if it’s a big enough deal to mention in the profile, we’re probably not compatible…”
- Timely_Cheesecake_35: “I’ll be honest, as a women, being a stoner or even just regular marijuana use, is a total turn off for me. I’m not into it at all and I’m not interested in anyone who is. So I’m glad it’s in the profiles when I see it. I’d hate to waste someone’s time, or figure out how to nicely end a date without embarrassing or upsetting anyone. I’d recommend keeping it on your profile, less dates means less time wasted.”
Should You Mention Cannabis Use In Your Dating Profile?
Nearly 45% of people prefer finding dates on online dating apps. 23% of these people use dating apps frequently, and 53% claim they’ve had positive experiences. These numbers suggest that your chances of finding romance or a casual partner with dating apps are pretty good. But could mentioning cannabis use in your profile lower your chances? Probably!
Although, 58% of Americans would date someone regardless of their marijuana use, the remaining 42% aren’t so open-minded. Even hopping on dating apps meant for cannabis users doesn’t guarantee improved chances. Just ask TimeOut’s Aiden Arata and our own Cesar Gallegos, who both tried 420-friendly dating apps and experienced equally disappointing results.
Anecdotal evidence suggests that what really scares off potential dates when they see “cannabis” or “420-friendly” in a profile is the instant assumption: Stoner Alert! Many worry it means cannabis is your whole personality, and that’s often a turnoff.
A Redditor, too_many_shoes14, probably said it best, “To me, if you put it in your dating profile then it’s a very important thing in your life and a lot of people don’t want to be with somebody who that’s an important thing for. It’s like putting in your profile that you’re a functioning alcoholic.”
However, people swiping left because you mention cannabis in your profile isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Think of it as filtering out incompatible people. Potential dates that you wouldn’t feel comfortable being fully yourself with. Sure, it might shrink your dating pool, but it helps you connect with only people willing to accept you as you are.
Should You Mention Cannabis On The First Date?
If you make it to a first date without bringing up your cannabis use, do everyone a favor and mention it then. But don’t be flippant about it. Rather, be deliberate, clear, and quick about it. After all, you don’t want your entire date being you talking about cannabis, because that’s already a red flag.
Clarify how and why you use it. Is it for medical or fun reasons? How often do you use it? Let your date know that you are a cannabis user, and which category you fall under. DON’T lie to them. Instead, educate them to the best of your capacity. Enlightening them can be particularly helpful if they’re hesitant due to bad past experiences or what they’ve heard from others.
If cannabis is a part of your life, not mentioning it early in the relationship could backfire. Your date might assume you deliberately hid it, making you seem deceptive and untrustworthy – two traits no one wants in a romantic partner.
PROS OF BEING UPFRONT ABOUT CANNABIS USE:
- It weeds out dates (pun intended). That’d be a poor match for you anyway, as they might judge or be incompatible with your lifestyle.
- You get to be yourself and build every new relationship on a foundation of honesty, trust, and open communication.
- Eliminates the risk of unwanted surprises and accusations of betrayal or deceitfulness.
- Saves emotional energy because you don’t have to start a relationship that goes nowhere.
POTENTIAL CONS OF MENTIONING CANNABIS USE:
- It could shrink your dating pool, which may delay or frustrate meeting someone.
- It could attract the wrong people, such as individuals who are only interested in cannabis and not a relationship.
- Might turn off non-users before they get a chance to know and fall for the real you.
- Might lead to false assumptions (e.g., stereotypes of being irresponsible or unmotivated), potentially harming your reputation.
You’re Not Alone
There’s someone for everyone. If Shrek and Gru could find love, you definitely can find someone too! Dating apps like Tinder and Bumble are a good place to start. If you want something more niche, try dating apps for cannabis enthusiasts like Blazr, High There, 420 Singles, and Date 420 Friendly.
You could also meet like-minded people at cannabis conventions, dispensaries, local 420-friendly events, or simply out in the wild while living your life. Just remember not to treat your cannabis use like some dark, evil secret. Be upfront about it, especially if you use it for therapeutic reasons. If they find it appealing or acceptable, you might have found a match. If they don’t, then maybe it’s not meant to be.
Hiding your cannabis use means entering a relationship built on deception. Even worse, it implies you’re ashamed. If that’s the case, you should learn to love yourself first as you search for someone who’ll love you as you are — sticks, stems, seeds, and all.
The post Is Cannabis A Dating Red Flag? appeared first on Cannabis Central.
